Jolie Downs: [00:00:00] Today we are speaking with Rachel Tomayo. Rachel is a former 9 1 1 emergency operator and police dispatcher. After 12 years in those dark depths, she gained a unique insight into  mental illness, human behavior, and the general darkness of humanity that she now likes to weave into her books. Originally an exclusive romance author.

[00:00:26] She tried her hand at thrillers in her award winning novel, crazy love. She loved it so much. She decided to keep going with the thriller category. I am so looking forward to learning more, Rachel, please, could you tell us a little bit about your journey as a nine 11 emergency operator into becoming an international best selling?

[00:00:45]Rachel Tamayo: [00:00:45] Yeah. Yeah. It's funny because I grew up actually wanting to be a police officer. 

[00:00:51] Jolie Downs: [00:00:51] Oh, interesting.

[00:00:52] Rachel Tamayo: [00:00:52] it's from I want to say maybe junior high, I wanted to be a police officer. And as I got into my later high school years, I realized how dangerous it was and I decided I wanted to have a family and how dangerous that was.

[00:01:08] And I wasn't sure what was going to happen. Just life goes on. Believe it or not there's not a terrible lot of qualifications as far as applying for a dispatch position. A position opened up in my hometown. So I have a, an abundance of customer service experience and I use that experience and I just fit the position really well.

[00:01:38] And. And I was the first person that the department actually hired had no experience. 

[00:01:45] Jolie Downs: [00:01:45] Oh, wow. What do you think, what do you think helped in your personality for this.

[00:01:49]Rachel Tamayo: [00:01:49] You just did very specific personality type. I would say I'm not a real emotional person. I don't get carried away with other people's feelings, I can sympathize with them without feeling their feelings, which some people just can't do. Like I'm not one of those people that's going to cry with you. I'm going to, I'm going to sit there with you and I'll talk you through it and I'll help you, but I'm not gonna cry with 

[00:02:17] Jolie Downs: [00:02:17] Yeah. And that's what they need at that point.

[00:02:19] Rachel Tamayo: [00:02:19] Exactly. I can turn off my feelings. I can shut my emotions down. And it's just a lot of things like that. And you have to be able to turn off your own feelings and deal with them later, which is a bit of a dangerous game to play actually.

[00:02:34]Let's actually what causes PTSD in the long run is doing that. You have to go back and revisit those feelings, or you do get PTSD. 

[00:02:43] Jolie Downs: [00:02:43] Oh, interesting. So then you would deal with those feelings just at a later time. That was obviously not in the crisis.

[00:02:50] Rachel Tamayo: [00:02:50] Exactly. Cause while you're dealing in that, you're in the middle of the crisis. You can't break down because you have to keep, you have to keep your head together. You have to think you have to be able to make very rapid fire decisions that people's lives officers' lives depend on. And 

[00:03:06] Jolie Downs: [00:03:06] I'm curious. Did they give you any advice to people who may have come into this role who did not have that quality immediately to help them manage?

[00:03:17]Rachel Tamayo: [00:03:17] Yeah, I was a trainer and you can tell  after a while you try to help them walk through it and  we would tell them training to do this job is the hardest thing you will ever do. It is the absolute, most difficult thing that I ever had to learn to do. And  really, it was the most hard, the hardest thing I've ever had to learn to 

[00:03:36]Jolie Downs: [00:03:36] What made it, I'm imagining what made it difficult, but let me tell me what, what made it 

[00:03:39] Rachel Tamayo: [00:03:39] the stress level is just as just astronomical in this. It's the training. Did you have a trainer on your back telling you have to do this, you have to do this, you have to do this. And just the knowledge of knowing the weight of your decisions. And you're so new to it. You're ma you're not seasoned basically.

[00:03:59]You're not used to it once you've, you have to be in it for at least a year before. You get used to it before you start becoming comfortable in your own skin and the decisions that you're making. 

[00:04:13] Jolie Downs: [00:04:13] That's a big deal too. And w what you're doing is a big deal. So it's not like you're sitting behind a computer and the mistake you made was on a draft that went out. Yeah. So I can imagine, how did you deal with that pressure going through that first year and learning everything? How did you deal with those feelings?

[00:04:29]Rachel Tamayo: [00:04:29] There was times when I was, I thought that I couldn't do it. When I would go home in tears and I would just think I'm going to fail. I'm not going to make it. And they would even tell me that, you have trainers that tell you, if you don't get through this, you're not going to make it.

[00:04:43]It's horrible. It's just, and then you do have that one trainer you'll have that person that pulls you aside and says, Hey, you can do this. This part is actually harder. This is harder. Once you get through this. You'll sit down and you don't have the stress of the training on you.

[00:05:01]It's like a weight lifts off of you, even though you still have the stresses of job, but the training itself is just 10 times makes it 10 times worse. 

[00:05:11] Jolie Downs: [00:05:11] oh yeah. 

[00:05:12] Rachel Tamayo: [00:05:12] Yeah, I thought I was going to fail and I think everybody that's ever been through that, been through the training field. 

[00:05:16]Jolie Downs: [00:05:16] so what keeps you going? Because that takes a lot to keep going when you're feeling that way. 

[00:05:20]Rachel Tamayo: [00:05:20] I didn't want to fail. It was like the one thing you've always wanted to do 

[00:05:25] Jolie Downs: [00:05:25] yeah.

[00:05:25] Rachel Tamayo: [00:05:25] you want to at least see it through to the end? I didn't want to be the one to walk away from it. 

[00:05:30]Jolie Downs: [00:05:30] Good for you. Good for you. That's awesome. 

[00:05:32]Rachel Tamayo: [00:05:32] Yeah. 

[00:05:32] Jolie Downs: [00:05:32] now what, when did you start writing? How did that come about?

[00:05:35]Rachel Tamayo: [00:05:35] I wrote when I was a kid, I started writing as a kid. Like when I was little, I would write little silly stories and read them to my friends and, to my family and this and that. And as a teenager, I was writing too. I was writing entire books as a teenager, but I would just write them and then put them in the closet 

[00:05:54] Jolie Downs: [00:05:54] Oh, wow. 

[00:05:55] Rachel Tamayo: [00:05:55] and Yeah, I was always doing it.

[00:05:58] I was not necessarily good at it then, but I was always doing it. And then I always wanted to be published. It was, but that was before the internet and it was a lot more difficult and you had to go get those big fat books, with how to get published and, go through lists of publishers and all their, it was lot harder back then because you didn't have the.

[00:06:17]And I want it to be published, I was nowhere near ready. And at some point I, life happened and I got married and had kids and I just stopped. And my husband never even knew that I wrote. And it was Always.

[00:06:30] in the back of my mind, I used to lay in bed at night and I would just think I think of my stories in my head, and right in my mind, and

[00:06:39]You, some years went by and I was like one of these days I gotta get back to writing, and I was in my mid thirties, I want to say 36, 37, something like that.

[00:06:51] And I decided to start writing again. 

[00:06:53] Jolie Downs: [00:06:53] They love it.

[00:06:54] Rachel Tamayo: [00:06:54] And I was on night shift. I just been put on night shift at work and I had nothing to do in the middle of the night. And I figured, you know what, I'm just going to start writing and see how it goes. And I started writing and I found some other people online to help me improve my writing.

[00:07:09] And it just, about a year or two years a year or two later, I got published. 

[00:07:16] Jolie Downs: [00:07:16] That's wonderful. You wanted to be a writer, so you started writing and that's what it's about. You start doing what it is that you want to be. 

[00:07:25] Rachel Tamayo: [00:07:25] Yeah. 

[00:07:26] Jolie Downs: [00:07:26] That's fantastic. And and then you found help on the internet through networks. So how, what did you do to find help on the internet?

[00:07:32]Rachel Tamayo: [00:07:32] I it's hard for a writer to take their writing to people, especially in the beginning that they know to criticize it, to say, I want to be better. Tell me what's wrong with this. And then you know that your friends are gonna be scared to tell you what's wrong with it. So there's a website cause doing the research I was doing. Critique circle, critique, circle.com and there's free versions and there's paid versions. It's really inexpensive. It's basically a website where you can there's other writers on there. There's there's amateur writers, there's professional writers.

[00:08:06] There's all kinds of writers on this website where basically you take your own writing and you post it chapter by chapter. And other writers go through your chapter and critique your writing, like line by line. And they earn points to post their own work by criticize by critiquing your work. 

[00:08:26] Jolie Downs: [00:08:26] That's great.

[00:08:27]Rachel Tamayo: [00:08:27] Yeah, of course, you have to take it with a grain of salt because there's always the occasional jerk on there, which is, mean.

[00:08:33] But for the most part, I ran into really great.

[00:08:37] comments and I was able to really make sure. Amazing corrections and find my voice and realize, I didn't know that I was writing in both past and present tense, and, I didn't realize and, pointed it out to me. I was able to fix it and make it better and find who I was using this assistance.

[00:08:56] And it made a huge difference. I don't know. I don't use it anymore. But I did for a couple of years and I really highly recommend it because they're strangers. You don't have to worry about, showing your work to anybody that you know, and you can get outstanding feedback. 

[00:09:14] Jolie Downs: [00:09:14] That's really great. I wonder if there's websites like this for other industries? Cause that's a brilliant plan. Really? I love that. So now w what, when did you decide to make the leap to only writing.

[00:09:27]Rachel Tamayo: [00:09:27] I do have a full-time job. I just don't dispatch anymore. 

[00:09:32] Jolie Downs: [00:09:32] Oh, okay. So what are you doing?

[00:09:33] Rachel Tamayo: [00:09:33] right now. I actually dispatch for a a HVAC company. I got out of law enforcement because I was developing PTSD after. Did the last really big call that I worked was the Santa Fe school shooting. And I was in an indirect dispatcher. Okay.

[00:09:58] I wasn't working as, Santa Fe dispatcher, but another agency called me because the agency I worked for had a joint response SWAT. Which means our re our SWAT team has multi agencies. We have three or four agencies, SWAT team, and they called us and I answered the phone and they said, we need you to inspect your SWAT team.

[00:10:21] Will you have an active shooter in Santa Fe high school? 

[00:10:24] Jolie Downs: [00:10:24] Jeez.

[00:10:25] Rachel Tamayo: [00:10:25] And I was the one that answered the phone and I just stopped for a moment. I was just. Or what, and I've had active shooter training. I've been dispatching by, at this point I'd been dispatching for probably about 11 years. And I've had active shooter training.

[00:10:40] I've had active shooter training with the SWAT team inside of school, on scene as a dispatcher. And and I was just like dumbstruck. I was like, Yeah. I was like in night, like right now. And she's yes. And I was like, he's still in there. Yes. Right now active. So I had to hang up and dispatch the SWAT team and our SWAT team responded and assisted in stopping that shooter. 

[00:11:13] Jolie Downs: [00:11:13] Oh, God, that's just a horrifying situation. 

[00:11:16]Rachel Tamayo: [00:11:16] It was awful. 

[00:11:17]Jolie Downs: [00:11:17] Yeah. I'm so sorry. How did you deal with going through PTSD? A lot of people experienced PTSD and they don't know how to deal with it. Is there anything that you did that was, that helped you?

[00:11:30]Rachel Tamayo: [00:11:30] I think the key thing for me was I caught it early enough before became a big problem because I saw the signs of it 

[00:11:37] Jolie Downs: [00:11:37] Yeah. You recommended.

[00:11:39] Rachel Tamayo: [00:11:39] I recognized that it was becoming a problem. And And seeing that I was struggling with Coles that I shouldn't be struggling with and that I would didn't use to struggle with. And just, things like that. And at the time I had, my son was five years old and I was just terrified to send him to school when that's not normal, shouldn't be feeling like that either. And, things like that, and I'm like, I care for my own mental health. I got two small kids to take care of.

[00:12:09] I think I've been doing this for long enough. It was really hard decision to make a very difficult decision because I was good at it. I was really good at it. And when I finally, it took me a while to find something else in the general vicinity of what I was doing that was halfway comparable.

[00:12:29] To the skills I had the assistant chief of police called me into his office and asked me why I was leaving. He's I really don't hate to lose a good dispatcher. Why are you going? And I explained to him why, and he's a cell. He told me, I, as much as I hate to lose a dispatcher, as good as you are.

[00:12:47] Cause I want awards. I've got multiple awards for dispatching. He said, I wish that everybody had the site that you have to protect your mental health because there's officers that are working here right now. They're completely burnout because they didn't do what you're doing right now. 

[00:13:06] Jolie Downs: [00:13:06] Yes, no that's wisdom right there.

[00:13:10] Rachel Tamayo: [00:13:10] Yeah, he was right. And I realized when he said that I was doing the right. 

[00:13:15] Jolie Downs: [00:13:15] No, you need to protect yourself and recognizing it early, that, that took a lot of wisdom within yourself to be able to recognize it early and then do something about it. Because a lot of times we might recognize it, but shove that down, I guess we're not ready to deal with it.

[00:13:33] Rachel Tamayo: [00:13:33] and plea is as recently is up to probably about a year ago. I've had opportunities to go back and. Wondered if I had made the right choice and I realized I don't want to go back because I'm afraid of what it would do. And I realize I'm done. It's just, now that I'm realizing I made the right choice because it was such a struggle.

[00:13:57] This was such a huge part of who I was and what I, when it. changed me So much doing that. For so long, I was afraid that I'd made wrong decision, but now I know that I didn't. 

[00:14:10] Jolie Downs: [00:14:10] And thank you for what you did there too. Cause that what you were doing was incredibly important job. So thank you for the time that you did that. And I noticed that you mentioned how you took a lot of what you learned about human psychology and and applied that to your books. Could you share, like what are some of the things that you learned from about humans or human psychology by being a dispatcher?

[00:14:33] Rachel Tamayo: [00:14:33] I think a big part of what I learned is basically everybody reacts so differently. No two people react the same way to the same. And everybody thinks that they know which I touched on this and carnal knowledge, actually my mother book, they came out last year. You think, you know how you're going to react to a situation you think, but when it comes right down to it, you don't, you just don't, because how can when you're faced with. Yeah,

[00:15:02] there's just absolutely no way that you can predict how you or anybody else is going to react to it. 

[00:15:07] Jolie Downs: [00:15:07] No. And oftentimes you act differently when faced with a similar situation and.

[00:15:13]Rachel Tamayo: [00:15:13] Exactly. Depending on, I can be faced with traumatic situations from strangers that, and stay completely and absolutely calm. But it'd be faced with the same situation with, somebody that I know or a family member and be completely different, yeah. So it's just, it's things like that.

[00:15:33] And there's people that get really angry and just people that, you know, and you have to understand and realize their reaction isn't, there's nothing to do with you, it has nothing to do with you. It's just how they're able to get through that moment at that time. 

[00:15:50] Jolie Downs: [00:15:50] Exactly. And that's really good lesson for everybody because when we go through difficult times, I know, when it's, for example a death in the family or something, people will judge how other people are reacting and that's just never fair. Like you said, everybody reacts differently and you just can't judge.

[00:16:08] You don't know what's going on inside someone there, how they're so

[00:16:14] Rachel Tamayo: [00:16:14] The other dispatcher, Sue. yeah. If a lot of people do it,

[00:16:18] Jolie Downs: [00:16:18] yeah. What do you feel has been one or two of your greatest successes in life and what did you learn from it?

[00:16:25] Rachel Tamayo: [00:16:25] I say I really proud of the time I spent as a dispatcher. It was I think it was become accomplishment for me in the awards that I did win in the citations from the chief that I got. I'm really proud of all that. And the honestly becoming a thriller writer is just a, I'm really proud of the fact that I did that.

[00:16:47]

[00:16:47] Jolie Downs: [00:16:47] Never think you'd be a thriller writer.

[00:16:49] Rachel Tamayo: [00:16:49] no, I honestly didn't. I, because it's, it was a goal and I was afraid to reach for it because it's such a hard. John Ritz. It's not it's cause like when you write romance, you just, you it's a lot easier, but when you write thrillers, it can go in any direction in any way you can end it any way you want to, it's just so different. And I was afraid I wasn't good enough to.

[00:17:13] Jolie Downs: [00:17:13] And then you win an award for it, right?

[00:17:16] Rachel Tamayo: [00:17:16] Yeah. Yeah, I did a crazy love. I've actually been nominated for several. I was a finalist break my bones was a finalist for Roman award last year. 

[00:17:24] Jolie Downs: [00:17:24] That's fantastic. Isn't that? Isn't that fantastic. Something that you were feeling so nervous about going for, and then you ended up getting awards for it and you find this new passion.

[00:17:34]Rachel Tamayo: [00:17:34] Yeah. It's, yeah, it is. I'm really proud of the fact that I was able to write and can get into writing thrillers and psychological thrillers. I really am proud of that. 

[00:17:44] Jolie Downs: [00:17:44] Did you have to learn anything new in order to do that?

[00:17:46] Rachel Tamayo: [00:17:47] I think I just had to grow as a writer, basically. I just had to grow as a writer and learn to roll with the punches, so to speak, and I sent something to the editor, my editor, and she says, you need to Take this out to make this better. I take it out and she's right. It is better, things like that, cause it's just story, I can always rewrite it, not to be so attached to my books that I can't change them.

[00:18:14] Jolie Downs: [00:18:14] Take your ego out of it. 

[00:18:15] Rachel Tamayo: [00:18:15] Yeah. Yeah, basically. 

[00:18:17]Jolie Downs: [00:18:17] What about a time that you had a really big obstacle or a big mistake? And what did you learn from it?

[00:18:22]Rachel Tamayo: [00:18:22] It's along the same lines. I guess the first thing that comes to mind is the first book. Did I use to try and find a publisher? They gave me good feedback on the writing, but they told me the story was not right. That you're like, it's too dark for this for romance. You need to, you need to do something else with this.

[00:18:42] And then I realized after I got, all the feedback I got, I had to sit down and make a hard decision and I decided. I had get re I had to the whole book, 

[00:18:54] Jolie Downs: [00:18:54] that's rough.

[00:18:55] Rachel Tamayo: [00:18:55] Yeah. And realize they were right. And I scrapped it and I had to start all over and I used the same characters but I realized they were, I it's true what they said.

[00:19:07] And that's how the friend zone series was actually born. How's was the same characters and ended up writing that series. 

[00:19:14] Jolie Downs: [00:19:14] Interesting. So you scrapped you took their advice, grabbed the book and you ended up creating something that turned into a successful. 

[00:19:21] Rachel Tamayo: [00:19:21] Yeah. Yeah, 

[00:19:23] Jolie Downs: [00:19:23] Very cool. Always, that's just, it's the mistakes, right? It's all about when you make mistakes and you have those perceived failures is all about learning from them because that's where the success is born.

[00:19:35] Rachel Tamayo: [00:19:35] Right It's okay to be wrong, basically. You're on the right path. Sometimes you just gotta start over. It's okay. 

[00:19:45] Jolie Downs: [00:19:45] Exactly. What do you think is key to having continued success through life?

[00:19:49] Rachel Tamayo: [00:19:49] To be okay with

[00:19:51]there's so many different things. To be okay with starting over. To be okay with not being okay. You know it, and the fact that your other people's success does not mean you're A failure.

[00:20:09] Your success is your success and you should not compare it to anybody. Else's. 

[00:20:14]Jolie Downs: [00:20:14] applause. Yes. That is a key. And is there anything that you've done specifically, like habits that you'd fill up that help you be successful with your writing be successful in what you do?

[00:20:27]Rachel Tamayo: [00:20:27] I don't have any particular writing habits.. I do tend to I tend to start the, start over and start over. And so I feel like I've got the story, right? I think you just need to basically do what worked for you. The whole, you don't have to listen to the masses, basically the whole, you have to write every day or you're gonna, lose your edge or whatever.

[00:20:50] No, you don't have to, don't force yourself because if you write better that way, then you know what you go right ahead. But if you don't worry about it that way, then don't because I sure don't, I'm just going to write absolute trash. If I do that, force myself to write, I'm just going to write a book.

[00:21:08] Nobody's going to want to read. I'll do?

[00:21:10] better. If I let it sit for six months in not right, right away. And then all of a sudden it'll come to me in the three months, all I've done, you do what works for you and don't worry about anybody else. 

[00:21:19] Jolie Downs: [00:21:19] you're so right. You were so right. There's all kinds of things that people tell us that we should be doing or need to be doing, but that does not negate our own success because. We all have different things that work for us.

[00:21:34] Rachel Tamayo: [00:21:34] Exactly. Because they do what works for them and their life and they forget. Their life. Isn't your life? 

[00:21:41] Jolie Downs: [00:21:41] Yeah. 

[00:21:41] Rachel Tamayo: [00:21:41] it's just not the same. 

[00:21:43] Jolie Downs: [00:21:43] Yep. Pick and choose we're in all the different lessons and pick and choose the ones that work best for you in your life.

[00:21:48]Rachel Tamayo: [00:21:48] Trial and error. 

[00:21:50] Jolie Downs: [00:21:50] It's a lot of trial and error, isn't it? 

[00:21:52]Rachel Tamayo: [00:21:52] No, 

[00:21:52]Jolie Downs: [00:21:52] W what is something that you've learned that throughout life that you feel is brought you the most benefit?

[00:21:58] Rachel Tamayo: [00:21:58] to be okay. In my own. 

[00:22:00] Jolie Downs: [00:22:00] Yeah.

[00:22:00] Rachel Tamayo: [00:22:00] okay with who I am and just accept accepted. And I'm okay with the fact that if somebody is not okay with it, basically, and I think some of that does come with age too. Cause when you're in your twenties, you want everybody to love you and everything. And then youth in your thirties you're working on you're in the middle of your family, and everything.

[00:22:23] But once you hit your forties, you get to that point where you're just like, you know what, whatever. 

[00:22:35] Jolie Downs: [00:22:35] that's the best part. If you asked me.

[00:22:37] Rachel Tamayo: [00:22:37] It really is my favorite part. I'm just not even worried about what you think anymore. 

[00:22:46] Jolie Downs: [00:22:46] Something magical about it. I have to say,

[00:22:52] and it is a key to success because you know what? I don't care what you have in your life. If you don't feel good about yourself, there's just no success.

[00:22:59] Rachel Tamayo: [00:22:59] Yeah, I think that, yeah, that's a huge key right there is that, I just really not concerned with what you say. 

[00:23:09] Jolie Downs: [00:23:09] I'm going to do what I want to do anyway.

[00:23:12] Rachel Tamayo: [00:23:12] It's going to be what it is. 

[00:23:17] Jolie Downs: [00:23:17] Now, have you had any you sounded like you might've had a little bit of a struggle finding that, right? Next thing after you. The police dispatcher. I'm curious if you have any advice that you'd give someone who's in the 40 plus category who might be struggling to find their right next opportunity or the right next path in this pivotal moment that we're in.

[00:23:37] Rachel Tamayo: [00:23:37] Yeah, I knew I had to stay in the same kind of family there because to start a new career altogether is not usually a good idea. At my age. But I was because of what I did, I was so overqualified for everything I applied for, because dispatch in.

[00:23:56] other companies is usually a small and minor position, an administrative position, they don't want to pay you the very much and.

[00:24:04]It was a really, I had a really difficult time, a really difficult, fun time 

[00:24:10] Jolie Downs: [00:24:10] Normal too. This is something that a lot of people are experiencing. So yes. Tell us how, what did you do? How did you get through this? What worked for you? 

[00:24:17] Rachel Tamayo: [00:24:17] God, it was, it took forever. It was more than a year actually, because I was struggling before, because I think I was struggling with the PTSD before the situation with school and this, the school shooting just actually cemented it. And it made me realize what I was going through and it made me realize I absolutely had to get out, but I went through a couple of years where I was looking for a job on.

[00:24:42] And I would look and apply here and there and every show where you're great, we really your skillsets just amazing, but you're overqualified, which is over overqualified is basically just a sneaky way to say, we really think you'd be good at this job, but I don't want to pay you for it. They don't want to pay you for it because you make too much, that's basically what they're trying to tell you. 

[00:25:06] Jolie Downs: [00:25:06] Yes, I did.

[00:25:07] Rachel Tamayo: [00:25:07] Yeah.

[00:25:09] And so I it's just matter of, you have to be patient because you're one person and I feel of how many of all these companies hunting, you just have to keep looking. You will find it when the time is right. Basically you just have to keep looking. Just don't stop. I think I tweaked my resume a few times. I'm thinking maybe if I change it here and there a little bit, and I just kept looking and then I finally found the company where my boss, which is the lady I work for now.

[00:25:39]She Interviewed me. And she told me because there were companies too that didn't want to hire me because they I've never worked in an, in dispatch for air conditioning company. And even though it's the same general thing, it's not an emergency situation where people's lives were a, but I'm telling you when somebody asks you and you're tying your taxes in the air, conditioner goes out, 

[00:26:01] Jolie Downs: [00:26:01] They're upset.

[00:26:02] Rachel Tamayo: [00:26:02] They're not happy at all.

[00:26:05] And it's an emergency, so my ability to talk to people that are usually pretty on edge, I have that skill. So 

[00:26:16] Jolie Downs: [00:26:16] It's an important skill in this moment.

[00:26:19] Rachel Tamayo: [00:26:19] I haven't lost it. Yeah,

[00:26:20] I still have that, she interviewed me. Yeah. We were talking about it and she's if you could do that, I have no worries about you being able to do this.

[00:26:30] And she saw me for what I could do, and she was the first and yeah, I finally found something. 

[00:26:36] Jolie Downs: [00:26:36] that's great. And I'm happy with what.

[00:26:40] Rachel Tamayo: [00:26:40] Yeah. Yeah. I actually do. If we're in our actually really busy season right now, cause it just got hot. This last one here it's been, up towards about a hundred degrees and we went through like a whole year of COVID and nobody we stayed open

[00:26:56]Slow because of COVID and everything.

[00:26:58] And now it's just like insanely busy. Yeah.

[00:27:01] it's a bit of a shock for everybody. 

[00:27:11] Jolie Downs: [00:27:11] Okay.

[00:27:11] Rachel Tamayo: [00:27:11] Yeah. We're in now it's back to normal and yeah, it's extremely busy season right now for us, but , I work well under pressure, so Yeah.

[00:27:20] I'm in my element. 

[00:27:21] Jolie Downs: [00:27:21] That's good. Good quality to have. So Rachel, if people want to find out more about your books, 

[00:27:28]Rachel Tamayo: [00:27:28] rachel Tomayo writes.com. Yes.

[00:27:30]Jolie Downs: [00:27:30] Rachel Tomayo rights.com and I'll have that link in the show notes. Is there anywhere else that you would want people to go to find out more about you? 

[00:27:38] Rachel Tamayo: [00:27:38] you

[00:27:38] can Google me generally. And there's a lot of information, but thats probably the first best place. 

[00:27:45] Jolie Downs: [00:27:45] Okay. 

[00:27:45] Rachel Tamayo: [00:27:45] Define me. 

[00:27:46]Jolie Downs: [00:27:46] All right. And any other relevant links, if you will have attached, but before we go, I'd love, I'd like to ask my final question, which is one of my favorites. What is it that you are sure of that.

[00:27:56] Rachel Tamayo: [00:27:56] I am sure that.

[00:27:57] you cannot be sure of anything. 

[00:28:04] Jolie Downs: [00:28:04] I agree.

[00:28:09] I love this question because I have a hard time thinking of my own answer. 

[00:28:13] Rachel Tamayo: [00:28:13] Yeah.

[00:28:14]The first thing that came to my mind. 

[00:28:15] Jolie Downs: [00:28:15] Thank you so much for your time, Rachel. I really appreciate it. Is there anything I didn't ask you about that you'd like to share before we go?

[00:28:22] Rachel Tamayo: [00:28:22] I don't think so, but let me just throw this out there. This month, I, if you can subscribe for free to in detail magazine, it's a magazine for people that like to read, like to write for free and me and a co offer. Cynthia Austin have written a dystopian. Suspense that's coming out this month in that magazine, the first installment will be out this month.

[00:28:48] So if you want to read it for absolutely free, just subscribe to in detail magazine. And again, you can go to my website and the directions will pop up how to subscribe to that. 

[00:28:59] Jolie Downs: [00:28:59] great. Thank you so much for your time, Rachel. 

[00:29:01]Rachel Tamayo: [00:29:01] Thank you so much for having me.  

Jolie Downs:

I loved talking with Rachel. I appreciate her sharing how tough becoming a 911 dispatcher was. Any role dealing with moments of crisis must have the most grueling and psychologically taxing training to go through, I personally can only imagine what that would be like. However, I would like to take a moment and thank any person currently working in a position that helps people in crisis, thank you for being there, in that moment, when someone is most needed. Thank you for choosing to be that person, this world would be a much more frightening place without you in it. 

Rachel shared how in the beginning, she would go home in tears, thinking that she would fail, that there was no way she’d be able to make it through. But this was important to her. She wanted to see it through so she didn’t give up. She kept showing up day after day, putting one foot in front of the other, and because she didn’t give up, she made it through. 

And you can to. 

No matter what stressful, taxing, or psychologically draining situation you are dealing with in life, right now, if the overlying outcome is important to you, do not give up. Keep going. Keep showing up, putting one foot in front of the other and eventually, you’ll make it through. 

Rachel went on to build a successful career as a 911 dispatcher, being a voice of calm for countless fearful souls and winning awards for her work. While she enjoyed her work, she kept thinking about the writing that she had always loved to do when she was younger. She had always written as a kid and young adult, with a goal of being published being formed at a young age. But then life happened, She got married, she had kids and that goal was put on the shelf. 

How many of you can relate to that? What childhood dreams did you have that were put to the wayside because life got in the way?  What is the thing that pulls at your heart with regret? 

Could you revisit it now? 

Rachel revisited that dream. In her late 30’s she decided to start writing again. For fun. For herself. She found people online to help her hone her craft and within a couple of years, she found herself realizing the dream of becoming a published author.  She has now gone on to create multiple book series and is an award winning novelist. 

She learned a lot through her journey as an author. Initially, Rachel was a romance novelist but had an interest in writing crime. It was a goal she was afraid to reach for, she was afraid she wasn’t good enough to do it, but Rachel had learned how to push through difficult goals. Going through her previous training and having gotten through the other side of something so difficult, Rachel knew she had to at least try. She set her goal, she made her effort, she rolled with the punches of change learning how to let go of her ego in order to learn and become the best she could be in a new genre, even having to start an entire book over from scratch. She learned it’s ok to start over again and sometimes starting over is what puts you on exactly the right path. 

Once again, Rachel made it through. And once again, that difficult thing she was worried she would fail at, she succeeded and found herself wining an award. 

Life is absolutely awesome if you just give yourself the chance. 

Rachel didn’t let her own inner negative voices stop her – and you shouldn’t either. 

This is a reminder that imposter syndrome is normal, everyone experiences it- the negative voices are normal but that does not make them right. When those voices start piping up in your head, simply acknowledge them, oh yes, there you are imposter syndrome, with no judgement and then immediately replace that negative thought with it’s most positive opposite. Keep repeating the process.

I have to give Rachel props for leaving her role as a 911 dispatcher when she noticed the symptoms of PTSD. Too often we stay in a situation that isn’t good for us, just because it’s familiar and it’s hard to make a change. Thankfully Rachel listened to the voice inside, she didn’t push it aside or shove down the feeling, she honored her intuition and in doing so, she protected her mental health. 

Rachel gave us another important reminder. That other peoples success does not mean you are a failure. Your success is your success and you cannot compare yourself to anyone else. Comparing yourself to others is a fools game and will steal your joy. The only person to compare yourself to is the person you were yesterday. Also, stay away from thinking about where you think you should be – when we look towards the future and think, I should have accomplished this by now, I should have done that by now- this will also steal your joy – again, instead look towards the past, how have you grown in the past month? How much have you grown in the past year? In the past few years? How much have you learned?That is your measurement for growth. 

Your focus needs to be on what works best for you and don’t worry about anyone else. To be ok in your own skin is the greatest gift you can give yourself. Let go of your self judgement, release any personal negative thoughts and forgive yourself of your past mistakes. You have needed every experience in your life to bring you to this moment. Every experience has provided you with learning and growth. Your imperfections are what makes you perfect, you are a wholly unique unrepeatable soul, and it is time to embrace your strengths. Remind yourself that you get to write your future. Live in the possibility that is you and become your own best friend. We all need to be the best example of what it looks like to love yourself. So step into your greatness and allow your light to shine. Do not dim your light in fear of others perceptions. for When you allow your light to shine brightly, you give permission for others to do the same. 

And that is my wish for us all. That you no longer shrink to fit the expectations and judgements of others and instead step into the light that is you, owning your worth, owning your greatness and owning the love and the joy that you all deserve. 

Until next time